It's a quarter to eight in the morning and I have been missing them since they left at four-thirty this morning. We said our good-byes last night but I found myself awake at four-fifteen and padding downstairs to get a last look at them and wave good-bye from my lit-up porch. We never played "Golf" and we never ate at Hires (it turns out Ed doesn't like Hires any better than Sam--this doesn't mean I'm giving it up as a family meeting place). I loved seeing all the cousins interact, the brothers together, and obsessing over our looming deaths with Ed. I would feel so alone without my fellow hypochondriac. Thank you, God, for the Cyberknife. I'm a believer!