"Hello, my name is HORST, and I will be your guide in Salzburg for two and a half hours in the pouring rain. I will lead you through puddles the size of lakes and destroy any illusions you might have had about the story from
The Sound of Music. Mozart was born here and grew up here. This restaurant has been here since 803. We have the largest, coolest music festival with the most talented musicians in the world. They play in this palace and here and here. This was built to accommodate a larger audience. Salzburg is the most cultured, hippest, oldest, goldest place in the wide world, you dumb little tourist turds."
"Hello, my name is HORST, and I will be your guide in Salzburg for two and a half hours in the pouring rain. I will lead you through puddles the size of lakes and destroy any illusions you might have had about the story from The Sound of Music. Mozart was born here and grew up here. This restaurant has been here since 803. We have the largest, coolest music festival with the most talented musicians in the world. They play in this palace and here and here. This was built to accommodate a larger audience. Salzburg is the most cultured, hippest, oldest, goldest place in the wide world, you dumb little tourist turds."
6 comments:
This makes me not sorry to have missed the Sound of Music tour when I was there. We did go to the salt mines, which was pretty fun. My favorite memory from Salzburg is the McDonald's sign that is actually tasteful and in keeping with the design of the Getreidegasse. American city councils should have such backbone.
Yes, it's the most expensive McDonald sign in the world.
I read this in my best German accent. I was trying to decide if he knew his picture was being taken and wasn't happy about it or if its actually a candid photo that is really good.
must see a picture of the mcd sign. still waiting on the toilet pics. maybe sarah will have to hook me up.
this made me laugh out loud.
Oh Louise. You hurt his poor feelings. It's in his eyes, can't you see? With all the idiots he thought you would understand.
That said, spot on ducky.
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