"One and one is three. Two and two is five. Three and three is seven. Four and four is nine. Your grandma is stupid and you come from her."
How evil is that? How twisted? He's the dearest, most trusting baby. He hasn't gone through that hideous stage where he only loves his mother. He loves everyone. He smiles so sweetly. I love him like crazy cakes.
And here's what's even more twisted: I was sorry that no one was there to hear me singing these macabre words in my lilting alto voice. There was no audience for this naughty dissonance. I especially missed Sarah, his mother, who has a dark side that you would never suspect. So when she and Sam returned (from the temple no less) I confessed what I had done at lunch. And Sarah laughed, really laughed, just like I knew she would.
Like-minded daughters in law are so satisfying. I have several of them.